Naruto Characters To Go
by NekoFan9
Summary: This is a fanfiction for those among us in need for a good laugh. The primal urge to get to know characters of the naruto universe traveled its way across the globe. One made it possible to deliver the characters to their new caretakers. But every interested soul should read the instructions of the particular character before finishing their delivery requests... have fun!
1. Neji Hyuuga

This is a fanfiction for those among us in need for a good laugh. The primal urge to get to know characters of the naruto universe traveled its way across the globe. It didn't take long until the desire reached the ears of an anonymous benefactor. Within a short time he made it possible to deliver the characters to their new caretakers. But every interested soul should read the instructions of the particular character before finishing their delivery requests…have fun!

Warning! This fanfiction contains: humor, sarcasm in its finest form, good jokes, bad jokes and decent advices for proper caring of fictional characters! Not to mention the unheard use of grammar and sentence mistakes, since English is not my native tongue. But I am positively seeing this as a little exercise for me to improve my language skills in the writing area.

Disclaimer: I am writing for fun. I don't earn my money with this. Everything belongs to Masashi Kishimoto.

The sources I needed to create my content for this fanfiction: Naruto wikia dot com, Naruto Databooks and the anime series of Naruto and Naruto Shippuuden.

 **Basic Information**

Name: Neji Hyuuga

Age: 18

Birthdate: July 3

Height: 172,1 cm

Weight: 54,2 kg

Gender: male (don't let appearances fool you. He tends to cover his most inner thoughts with his double-edged looks)

Favorite food: herring soba

 **Additional Items**

Clothes: White kimono-shirt with long sleeves, matching pants, grey apron, black shinpbi sandals, black Konoha-Headband and special Hyuuga underwear.

Weapons: pouch with kunais and shuriken, limited amount of paper bombs

Books: "Master Yourself ~ Master Your Team"

Advice from aside: For the love of god… don't forget to pack his underwear and his book. He won't forgive you. But you should be allowed to exchange common pleasantries after a break of silent grudges consisting of 2-3 years.

 **Hidden Character Sides**

 _ **Oracle – Mode**_

Any form of social progress is calculated and limited by fate. Neji Hyuuga follows this concept of life almost fanatically. He literally needs a claps on his head to strengthen his horizons. Or a good piece of talking no jutsu should be able to help in worst case scenarios. Please send both types of requests to Naruto Uzumaki. (Do it! The foxy kit has the habit to get bored easily, which end up in the suffering of important figures. My humble figure to be exactly…). In this Mode he is unable to grasp the concept of social life and the means family and friends. You may be able to reach out to him, if you are able to pose yourself as a proper rival for Neji, since he needs every! opportunity to prove himself, especially in the presence of Hyuuga main-house members. *cough*show-off*cough*.

 _ **Bourgeois – Mode**_

This side of Neji is the result of the proper execution of the explained instructions in "Oracle-Mode" and is additionally on of the basic forms of Neji Hyuuga. You may be unable to get a decent laugh to one of your jokes or any reaction at all, but there is a high possibility that you are tolerated by him, which means less spiteful remarks by him and more feelings of happiness for you. And we all know the fact: tolerance is the basic key for a proper relationship. But I don't get your hopes too high, girls! Slow progression and subtleness are the other basic elements! He needs to be treated with care.

 _ **God – Mode**_

Neji Hyuuga is in the possession of God's patience. Otherwise I won't be able to explain the fact that he is still mentally intact being in the daily presence of Rock Lee and Might Guy. Constant expressions of affection by his teammates – the patience won't waver. Multiple summons of unexpected sunrises – the patience won't waver. Leading the Hyugas through the Fourth Shinobi World War- the patience won't waver. Please let me remind you of the little book mentioned in "Additional Items". Don't forget this little token or his patience will fly out of the window.

 _ **A heart for younger cousins – Mode**_

No need for panic. Neji Hyuuga is indeed able to express common forms of social affections towards his cousin Hinata Hyuuga. He cares deeply for her and balance his negative attitude, which comes to life during "Oracle-Mode". Brace yourself lovers of Hinata's upper body half, there is a storm waiting for you in the closet of your room waiting for your doom. Constant animosity towards Naruto Uzumaki and Jiraiya are guaranteed.

 **FAQ's**

 _Q: "My Neji is a pervert and doesn't know the concept self-control. This fact wouldn't annoy me that much, if it isn't directed at his cousin Hinata!"_

A: Oh, you received the "Neji Hyuuga – Road To Ninja"-edition. Please excuse us, we don't know the developer of this creature either. No time to waste – you will of course get a proper edition of him without Hinata.

 _Q:"My Neji survived magically the Fourth Shinobi World War and witnesses the romance between Naruto Uzumaki and Hinata Hyuuga now. I don't know why, but I am afraid… there is a lot of killing intent floating around the village."_

A: Yes, there is a reason why he seemingly unnecessarily died in the original course of action. Kishimoto was afraid, too…

 _Q:"I went to a Thai restaurant with Neji. He took one bite and is lying on the ground. I've tasted his food short moment after his blackout and nothing seemed wrong with his food. It was in fact pretty tasty. So what's wrong with him?"_

A: First of all: Eat his food. We don't want to have a waste of good food. And maybe I've forgotten to mention Neji's non-existent spice-tolerance… don't worry, he should be fine tomorrow.


	2. Naruto Uzumaki

Oh, I've checked the first chapter. It looked a bit different than the version I had on my word document. So I changed it back to a more readable version for fanfiction dot net. I'm used to a different method of uploading stories.

Anyway let's move on to our next character. There might be able some problems recognizing him, since his unique clothing colors give him a subtle charm during stealth missions. He usually flashes his opponents with his appearance in order to make them unable to reopen their eyes again. You know who I am talking about: it's Naruto Uzumaki, dattebayo!

 **Basic Information**

Name: Naruto Uzumaki

Age: 17

Birthdate: October 10

Height: 166 cm

Weight: 50, 9 kg

Gender: male

Favorite food: Ramen (it took a good guess on my side to solve this hidden secret of him…)

 **Additional Items**

Clothes: black-orange jumpsuit, shinobi sandals, black hitai-ate

Weapons: pouch with kunais and shuriken, limited amount of paper bombs

Books: "How to find loved lost ones" – illustrated edition, "Friendship Is Magic" – Comic Series

Advice from aside: Naruto takes the concept of "Friendship Is Magic" a little bit too seriously. Mo matter where he goes he is bound to make friends out of people he sees for the first time of his life. Even enemies.

 **Hidden Character Sides**

 _ **Main Character – Mode**_

Tragic past, constant reminder of his career goal, no relevant hindrances towards reaching this goal, hidden superpower, fiery character traits and a long-lasting lovestory with lots of longing as a side-quest… see any pattern? It even sounds familiar. And it's not like I am implying that the course of action is getting predictable or something. Taking all of this in consideration it is highly unlikely that Naruto Uzumaki is going to die in the near future or his enemies will have a fair chance of winning. "Losing" is simply not programmed for this character… but! Konoha officials are insisting him of catching up with the higher art of education of the past years. How much time passed, since he got out of school until he gets the position of his dreams without reading any adequate book explaining the required skills to rule a village? 5 years? 6? This little hindrance even gets 10 seconds of screentime!

 _ **50 shades of love – Mode**_

Is he in love with Sakura Haruno? Does he give in to the permanent signs of affection by Hinata Hyuuga? Do we have an unknown unpredictable lover somewhere? Or is there a very special reason searching for his old teammate, although Sasuke Uchiha makes it obvious that he doesn't want to have any connection at all towards him? Even after the war he isn't interested in staying near the village. Coincidence? I don't think so. Naruto, please, decide yourself!

 _ **Akamichi – Mode**_

Naruto Uzumaki's ancestors had a secret love affair with a member of the Akamichi clan. Otherwise I am unable to explain the amount of food he consumes without gaining a drop of weight. Yes, we know that Naruto has to eat for two – Kurama doesn't want to starve. Yes, Naruto does athletic exercises throughout the day, which might explain the condition of his body. But still… we are gaining so much insight into Japanese food we could make a cooking show out of the original series. Lots of filler episodes would finally make sense and would contain worth knowing guidelines to survive the daily life. Children, THAT is education.

Advice from aside: To all future Naruto Uzumaki owners - you need a decent amount of income to provide for his food. Even spending all of his own money for ramen goes hand in hand.

 **FAQ's**

 _Q: "I have a harem full of men and women in front of my door?! What's going on? I didn't sign up for this!"_

A: Are those harem members attractive or are they in the possession of inhuman sex appeal? If so, then why do you want to have them away? And if not, … then you are unlucky. Naruto makes special friends wherever he goes, so he would find new harem members in no time.

 _Q: "I need a delivery of Sasuke Uchiha to strengthen his relationship with Naruto! *turns red and starts drooling*"_

A: Clean the carpet! I don't want to see any drops of drool when I come back. Any yes, of course you are getting delivered Sasuke to your home. We even have a special edition for both of them. And it might be the only chance to get rid of the harem members.

 _Q: "There is a huge fox with nine tails lying on my floor. What am I supposed to do?"_

A: Nothing. Please send him back to us. We lost him a few days ago, although he gets his own package.

Who do you want to have next? Any "delivery" wishes? :D


	3. Hinata Hyuuga

**Basic Information**

Name: Hinata Hyuuga

Age: 16

Birthdate: December 27

Height: 160 cm

Weight: 45 kg

Gender: female

Favorite food: zenzai and cinnamon rolls

 **Additional Items**

Clothes: lavender and white colored hooded jacket, blue pants, low-heeled sandals and special Hyuuga underwear

Weapons: pouch with kunais and shuriken, limited amount of paper bombs

Books: "Patience is a virtue"

Advice from aside: Same rule applies to Hinata as well – don't forget the special Hyuuga underwear.

 **Hidden Character Sides**

 _ **Angel – Mode**_

Considering the fact that her generation grows up in an environment that brainwashes its people until they believe it is okay to send little children to the battlefield, Hinata actually keeps her sanity, faces every challenge in her way and grants them additionally a touch of grace. Not only her physical skills improve over the time but also her mental strength increases greatly. It very well may be that she is unable to draw a secret superpower out of her sleeve, Hinata instead gains her strength from within and forms her to the very person we all know and learned to respect until today. From a little crybaby to a delicate power-woman. Hats off! That's the kind of a character development we all love to see!

 _ **Shut Down – Mode**_

This mode comes to life in the presence of Naruto Uzumaki. A special sensor ability is attached as well, thus makes it possible to detect him in a radius of 5km. All forms of hindrances ignored, thanks to the byakugan… Whenever he is detected by Hinata, she stops all activities and starts heating up. The color in her face gets a little bit too healthy until she resembles a ripe tomato (insert a bad hananero-joke here: ). Even her ability to speak seems to hide, given that only huddles of stuttering letters leave her mouth in the specific moment. In addition to that she also tends to stick her index finger together. All in all we receive a little mix of an overheated brain, limited ability to speak and limited movement… great! Without the red face she would be able to pose as a dead body!

Advice from aside: Just try to avoid this mode or Naruto in general, since he is the ultimate trigger of her not so hidden side of her

 _ **I forgot the special Hyuuga underwear – Mode**_

Congrats! Now you've done it! You forgot to pack the Hyuuga underwear. Don't tell me I hadn't warned you before.

The absence of the underwear triggers another special mode of her. Similar to every other Hyuuga. I didn't include Nejis special mode for safety reasons…

Her whole demeanor changes and transforms to a bi*chy version of Hinata. She starts swearing, complaining, gets riled up easily and tends to react in a rather violent way. No matter what you do Hinata is always right.

Advice from aside: In order to prevent any more damages I advise you to stay away from Menma *cough*Naruto*cough* (I seems I'm getting a cold).

 **FAQ's**

 _Q: "Naruto activated his Shadow Clones and is everywhere. Literally. And now it seems like my Hinata is stucking in her Shut Down–Mode. I need a little help here."_

A: Yes, that's a common problem. Try restarting the system.

 _Q:"I prefer her complaining queen mode to her ordinary Angel-Mode. How do I keep her like this?"_

A: Oh, you are one of THEM. Just keep forgetting packing her underwear and nothing will change.

 _Q:"I gave Menma an ordinary handshake and now I don't get rid of that nasty feeling following me for the whole day."_

A: And this nasty feeling won't leave you for a long time, that's for sure. If I remember correctly, I said "stay away from Menma". Listen to the wise lady and you won't have to live with long-lasting and extensive death intent.

Hurray, one more chapter^^

I needed a bit longer for this upload, since I've prepared several character instructions in advance. By the way, should I make the chapters longer or is this length okay? This type of a fanfiction makes it easy to include more character modes to make it longer. It doesn't work with every character, but I will add more, if you want to read more texts.

Who's next? You decide!


	4. Might Guy

Warning!

Due to the utilization of the most unique choice of words, a reader tends to be more youthful at the end of this chapter.

 **Basic Information**

Name: Might Guy

Age: 30

Birthdate: January 1

Height: 184 cm

Weight: 76 kg

Gender: male

Favorite food: super-spicy curry rice and curry udon

 **Additional Items**

Clothes: green jumpsuit, Konoha flak jacket and orange leg warmers, red hitai-ate

Weapons: nunchaku

Books: "Springtime of Youth – the series" written by Might Guy himself. It's a must-have for everyone, besides this series will be part of this year's required reading. Brace yourselves, students!

Advice from aside: Children, there are two options now to handle this situation. Either you start reading this book series and risk your own sanity or you let them rest on the table and risk your grade with the incoming pop quiz. And don't even think about asking the hokage for help. He was after all the one, who approved of the educational addition. In the end, even a hokage stands no chance against Might Guy's youthful art of persuation.

 **Hidden Character Sides**

 _ **Nice Guy – Mode**_

It's unbelievable, but true. The Nice Guy – Mode is Guy's first half of his basic pattern of personality, which gets emphasized on a daily basis. Guy starts his day with his near endless enthusiasm and makes the world shining brightly again… literally. Besides the training, he pursues his most youthful activity by sharing his energy with the world. It would be no good, if someone files a complaint containing the most un-youthful thoughts, since the person was unable to receive his daily dosage of Konoha's Green Beast. There is enough Guy for everyone! His being is unique and is able to bring new life to Konoha, which tends to suffer from a good portion of destiny and mopishness from time to time.

Advice from aside: To every Hyuuga and Uchiha citizen, you are unable to hold your own against Might Guy's most youthful charisma!

 _ **Beast – Mode**_

This mode is the second half of his basic personality. Might Guy spends every second of the day with training. And thanks to his absolute dedication to his training regime and most youthful work, he achieved his well-earned his position of the greatest Taijustu-expert ever in existence. All of his goals are reached with pure ambition, the will to get stronger and hard work with his body. No special ability, no special lineage, no hidden superpowers – just Might Guy. Because of him, the Will of Fire is in need of a refreshed definition.

 _ **Watchman - Mode**_

Might Guy has every quality a true friend needs: great dedication, pure loyalty, urge for honesty and a surprising awareness for others feelings. Under the thick youthful appearance lays a very observant side making him aware of his environment, which makes it possible for him to maintain a long-lasting friendship with a secretive person like Kakashi Hatake. His serious side also saves his life several times during greater battles. So, remember kids: Underneath the shiny Good Guy lays a true shinobi!

 **FAQ's**

 _Q: "Might Guy asked me to take part of his early morning exercise. What do I need for a proper preparation?"_

A: A gravestone….. or a reservation for a hospital bed. Darling, you won't feel anything of your body when he is finished with you. And yes, the suggestiveness was intended.

 _Q:"He is too loud, too jumpy, too….YOUTHFUL! How long does it take until my complaint letters get worked at?"_

A: It usually takes us 3 seconds to handle a complaint about Might Guy. 1 second to receive the letter in our hands, 1 more second to turn around and 1 second to throw it into the next bin. It takes a great amount of throwing skill on our side to successfully complete this task.

 _Q:"I need help with my diet…."_

A: You don't need a diet; you need a healthy training regime. Luck is on your side today. You should approach Might Guy, since he is the developer of the most youthful appearances.

Who's next? You decide!


End file.
